If you or someone you love has a controlling partner, you’ll likely notice these signs.
1. They Make All the Decisions
A controlling person makes all the decisions. Your opinion and ideas are dismissed in favor of what they think and want.
You don’t have an equal role in the relationship, and you find that you usually just go along to get along because they’ll make life hard for you otherwise.
2. You’re “allowed” and “not allowed” to do/say things
A partner who is a controlling person will want to take charge of your activities, the way you present yourself, and the people you surround yourself with.
It’s a controlling person’s way of feeling important and heard. Such behavior can lead you to isolation, losing the sense of self and identity, and questioning self-worth.
3. They don’t communicate – They’re passive-aggressive
They make hurtful; ironic; jokes about you, they get silent and act distant without sharing why.
This damaging form of emotional manipulation leads you to feel unwanted, guilty, and in constant need to improve something so that you don’t repeat the mistake they made you believe you did.
4. They overreact to small things
A controlling partner uses this[overreacting] as a tool to make you feel guilty for something small, or even unimportant, that you did. It’s a way of making you feel insecure so that you feel like you’re not doing enough, and that you’re hurting them.
5. They don’t take responsibility nor acknowledgment for their damaging behavior
They may or may not be aware of their damaging behavior. However, when a particular hurtful move of theirs towards you is addressed, they don’t take responsibility nor acknowledgment for what they did.
They’re prone to denial, refusing to apologize, and being indifferent to your feelings.
6. They Criticize You
One key sign of a controlling partner is that they constantly criticize you. It’s not just that they make you feel insecure with their passing comments and jokes. They are directly critical of you all the time.
Over time, this can wear you down. You feel like you can’t say or do anything right. They twist everything, and you just find it easier to walk on eggshells than deal with their outbursts.
7. They want proof for everything: location, activities, conversations…
A controlling manipulative partner will need constant validation, and constant proof of your location, your activities, and your conversations. This is due to their insecurities, lack of trust in people, and inner instability they constantly deal with.
They have a war within them, they don’t trust themselves which leads to them having a hard time comprehending that someone could be sincere without an expectation or ulterior motive.
