A man went to his lawyer and told him, “My neighbor owes me $500 and he won’t pay up. What should I do?”
“Do you have any proof he owes you the money?” asked the lawyer.
“Nope,”replied the man.
“OK, then write him a letter asking him for the $5,000 he owed you,” said the lawyer.
“But it’s only $500,” replied the man.
“Precisely. That’s what he will reply and then you’ll have your proof!”
A lawyer runs a stop sign in Glasgow and gets pulled over by a local elderly policeman.
He thinks that he’s smarter than the cop because he’s a lawyer from the one and only London and is certain that he has a better education than any local cop.
He decides to prove this to himself and have some fun at the cop’s expense.
The elderly policeman says,
“License and registration, please.”
The Lawyer says, “What for?”
The cop says, “Ye didnae come to a complete stop at the stop sign.”
London Lawyer says, “I slowed down, and no one was coming.”
The policeman said,”
Ye still didnae come to a complete stop. License and registration, please”
The Lawyer says,
“If you can show me the legal difference between slow down and stop, I’ll give you my license and registration and you give me the ticket. If not, you let me go and don’t give me the ticket.”
The cop says, “Sounds fair. Exit your vehicle, sir.”
The Lawyer exits his vehicle.
The elderly policeman takes out his baton and starts beating the living daylights out of the lawyer and says,
“Daeye want me to stop, or just slow down?!”
