A newly married couple was walking through a garden suddenly a dog ran towards then.
They both knew it will bite them.
The husband lifted his wife and thought let the dog bite him than his sweetie.
The dog stopped before them barked for a while and ran backwards.
The husband put his wife down expecting a kiss or hug from her.
Then his wife shouted
“I have seen people throwing stones and sticks at dogs this is the first time I am seeing someone throwing his wife at a dog”.
Fred gets home late one night and his wife,
Linda, says, “Where in the hell have you been?”
“I was out getting a tattoo,” Fred replied.
“A tattoo?” she frowned.
“What kind of tattoo did you get?”
“I got a hundred dollar bill tattooed on my privates,” he said proudly.
“What the hell were you thinking?” she said, shaking her head in disdain.
“Why on earth would an accountant get a hundred dollar bill tattooed on his privates?”
“Well, for one, I like to watch my money grow,” said Fred.
“Two, once in a while I like to play with my money.
“Three, I like how money feels in my hand.
“And, lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks anytime you want.”
