When you says one of these phrases to your partner, you are little by little dєstroying your relationship
1. “I should never have married you.”
As a couple we want to hear that our partners would marry us again and again, which is why this can be so painful to hear. It’s a statement that undermines the covenant that was created when you committed to the partnership. Saying this to your wife or husband can create deep resentment and feelings of insecurity which can be incredibly challenging to repair.
2. “I’m no longer attracted to you.”
This is one that can be very hard for people to overcome, even if it was not something that was intended. That’s why it can be such a damaging thing to say. Humans in general have a very difficult time being told they are unattractive and then believing that our partner didn’t mean it. It can stop ιnтιмacy in its tracks for long periods of time, and it’s a hard one to repair.
3. “You are such a slob.”
This type of statement is criticism in the form of name-calling, which is damaging to relationships. Instead, try asking for what you need with gentleness. A better approach would be rephrasing your wishes gently but clearly by saying something like, “Would you please put your dirty dishes in the dishwasher tonight before going to bed?”
4. “Why can’t you be more like her/him?”
Negative comparisons of one’s partner to others creates insecurity and hurt between people. They may feel that they can never live up to some imagined person and/or that they are unworthy. Or, they might just get really angry and decide to check out. Ultimately, negative comparisons are highly unproductive and erode trust in relationships.
5. “You know what your problem is? You’re just selfish.”
Placing the problem within your partner is an especially damaging form of criticism that can breed insecurity or disdain in your partner. Instead, complain without blame by saying something like, “I was surprised to see you ate all the leftovers. Please check with me before doing that again.”
6. “Clearly, you let people down all the time.”
Avoid using information that your partner shared with you about other conflicts in their lives against them when you argue. A sure fire way to damage the trust between you is by using your knowledge of some vulnerability that they have against them when you are in conflict. This is siding with the enemy and you will become part of the enemy.
Source: amazinglovequotes.org
