An older housekeeper was interviewing for a new position at a wealthy estate. The hiring manager looked over her impressive references, nodded, and asked, “Your record is spotless, ma’am. But I have to ask—why on earth did you leave your last employment? They are known to pay excellent wages.”
The woman shook her head vigorously and frowned. “Oh, yes sir, the money was fantastic! But it was the most scandalous, ridiculous place I have ever worked in my life. The homeowners and their wealthy friends played a bizarre game called ‘Bridge.’ Last night, they had a massive party, and just as I was about to walk into the parlor with a tray of refreshments, the things I heard made my jaw drop!”
The manager leaned forward, intrigued. “What did you hear?”
“Well first, I heard a gentleman shout loudly, ‘Lay down and let’s see what you’ve got!'” the maid whispered dramatically. “Then, another man groaned and said, ‘I’ve got strength, but absolutely no length!'”
The manager choked back a laugh as the maid continued, wide-eyed.
“It gets worse, sir! Another man looked right at a lady and snapped, ‘Take your hand off my trick!’ I nearly dropped my silver platter right then and there, especially when the lady fired back, ‘You jumped me twice when you didn’t even have the strength for one raise!'”
“Oh dear,” the manager smiled.
“That was the final straw, sir! Right after that, one lady started talking about ‘protecting her honor,’ and two other women openly agreed, ‘Well, now it’s time for me to play with your husband, and you can play with mine!’ I didn’t wait around for another second. I grabbed my hat and coat and bolted for the front door!”
The maid leaned in close, crossing her heart. “And I swear to you, sir, as I was slamming the door behind me, I heard someone sigh and say, ‘Well, I guess we’ll go home now… that was the last rubber!'”
